"Whatever you do work at it with all your heart as working for the Lord not for men"
Lately I've been feeling down, most of the time I lose my temper. I don't know why, but perhaps because of fatigue. Actually my endurance with work is long but whenever I come to deal with client "na pasaway" my energy is draining. I want to take a leave from work just for a day but my papa won't let me =(. In additions to that, I'm realizing something, I am becoming the person that I dislike. And this realization add to my burden... Back when I was a student, I get annoyed with group mates who never help, a leader who doesn't do anything, in other words irresponsible. Sometimes my grades suffer because of those kind of people. I remember one incident in our literature class where in we have to memorize the poem of "lord randal" and put tunes in it, and sang that ballad with interpretation by group in class. I start memorizing that ballad little by little since the day the teacher announced that assignment. As the performance day come nearer, other groups were already practicing but mine??? I think it was Friday that our group had a meeting, the leader assigned the task of doing the actions to someone and we have to meet on the next day (Saturday) for practice. The next day it was raining, but despite of the bad weather I came to school but my group mates were nowhere to be found. Well I understand the fact that the weather was bad, in fact the school activity for that day was suspended, so I just went home. Then the leader called and asked if I knew the tunes of a certain song, I told her that I don't. (I'm not a fan of music so I'm not so familiar with many songs). I guess it was on Monday (the performance day), out of eight only two knew the tunes, and the rest of us just hum as instructed by the leader. After our performance the teacher asked what the six of us were doing. The leader replied we were humming and was supposed to do the action... I failed. Fast forward to present. Me and my two office mates were assigned to audit a certain client, I think I did my part but when sir said "sino ba sa inyo ang keypoint (referring to my two office mates) kayo dalawa ang nagtutulungan" I was in a shock mode, does that mean that I'm not in any way helping. Am I becoming the person that I dislike? I'm sorry Father God for being a disappointment to my employer and most especially to you.
- 陳錦錦
