Visit payless store at Lucky
chinatown mall. This was my first time to visit it. Everytime that I went to chinatown
I would want to go inside but I was so shy to enter the store and finally this
afternoon before I went home I muster the courage to went to that that shoe store.
Inside I saw a lot of shoes, well of course what do you expect from a shoe store?
As I was scanning, there are shoes that I would like to try on but then have a second
thought. Why? same as the reason why it took me days before I got the courage to
visit that store. Shyness is the reason and it also has to do with inferiority issues.
I don't know but I don't feel that someone like me had
the right to go or even to try their shoes. Don't get me wrong, it's
not because of the people inside, actually the sales lady are all nice. The problem
was with me, I don't feel that someone like me is fit to enter that kind of place. In short I'm insecure, Well I think it has something to do with the past when some people around me makes me feel that I'm nothing. But then on the second thought why would I feel insecure??? And I learned something from the book that I was reading from Tom Holladay, "If you felt truly secure in God's love for you, you wouldn't have nothing to envy, you wouldn't need to boast, and you wouldn't have to build your ego by feeding it heaping helpings of pride." Besides why would I feel insecure if God loves me?
- 陳錦錦
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